18 November 1955 “Why I like my Mother in Law: Book Two”

Well, as I mentioned in a comment on yesterday’s blog, I am really now realizing just how much I actually do admire my MIL. I have mentioned why, through her child rearing, I respect and thank her for making my dear hubby the person he is today. I had also forgot to mention that none of what I know of her child rearing came from her mouth. There were never conversations such as, “Well, when I was raising the kids, I did this.” Or, “We always had meals on time and this was how it was done.” In fact, my MIL is rather modest in most she does. She is never boastful and lives in  a sort of natural quiet state amongst the things I really think of as amazing. Her organized and beautiful home, her boating abilities, her amazing gardens and yard, her cooking and even her cherished display of her family pride. She does this all with a sort of subdued grace that would never seem boastful or prideful. That is why I can see that some of you might think, “Oh, she was just saying she did this or that” when in actually she has never mentioned the subject unless I ask, and only then will she begrudgingly reply, brushing off what she did as ‘no big deal’.

It is from my Hubby and my SIL’s lips that I know the real story. In fact this morning at breakfast hubby thanked me for the wonderful post about his mum. He said he read the comments and said, “You know, it really was that way. We had only a few cherished toys and they were not always strewn about. My mum always kept our rooms neat and tidy for us, but because she did so, we just sort of followed suit. We never had the ‘Get in there and clean up your room’ talk because if we didn’t do it she did and we often did it, so she wouldn’t have to. It was a definite give and take. Also, the rest of the house was always clean and orderly so it would have seemed odd to not ‘pick up when we were done’.”

This really got me thinking, it seems that honestly the example seems such a powerful teaching tool to your child. I mean if a parent lives in a messy room with clothes on the floor and things piled all over, how could they honestly ask their child to tidy up their room? I am not saying it probably doesn’t happen, but it does seem a bit unfair. Again, please don’t think I am trying to tell anyone what to do or how to live, it is hardly any of my business, only I live with a result of a mother who probably spent more time ‘teaching by example’ than ever ‘telling what to do’.

Now, I admire my MIL in her own right and not just for her being a good mother. She was an only child. She grew up in a sort of sad dark cloud, as her father, whom she loved and doted upon her, died when she was 9 of cancer.

He, probably even more so, became a distant God in her mind, as she recalled him as the wonderful handsome man speeding about in his fast boats, sailing, dancing, just being that sort of Cary Grant-esque sort of figure a man with some means in the 1940’s could be. There are pictures of him, handsome and tan, hair slicked back standing in one of his boats. He was sadly replaced with a man we all have come to loathe in my hubby’s family.

When my MIL had to be in the wedding of her mother and new step father, she was so saddened and unhappy, she walked half way down the aisle, threw her basket of rose petals and ran away crying! The resulting years with the step-father (whom my husband often refers to as the ‘evil grandfather’) were not happy years.

Yet, despite all the contention and abuse my MIL witnessed at her own mother, she managed to turn out rather well. The point where my MIL grew up is a small jutting pennisula that slips out into the Atlantic. We often laugh, when we hear the old stories of that ‘point’ from the 40s-ealry 60’s as it sounds much like the Great Gatsby. There are stories of a wives sneaking out of windows for dalliance with the neighbors, late night cocktail parties and you can imagine.

My MIL had to openly witness her step-father’s adulteries and even when I was first married to my hubby we openly spoke of ‘Del’ or ‘Mack’ two current concubines of the evil grandfather, though my MIL mother was still alive. So, in a nutshell, my MIL grew up in privilege but in a very sordid way that she wanted to remove herself from as soon as she could. This resulted in her going away to fashion school in Boston as soon as she was done with high school.

She has had quite a few adventures in her life. When she was young and first married to her first husband, she traveled around a bit with him, living in everything from nice apartment in Paris to a trailer park in the states.

After she met my hubby’s father, she came into her inheritence and gave up her dress shop and nice home on Cape Cod to go live on a farm in Maine. The spirit of adventure called her to it. She, unfortunately, soon found my hubby’s father was not willing to help, and she was left to run a farm, hand milking, killing chickens, making butter and cream and raising a child, while her new husband did little to help. She loved the farm and speaks fondly of it now.

I once asked her, “If things had worked out with you and hubby’s father, do you think you would have stayed”.' Without skipping a beat, with a twinkle in her eye, she said. “Oh, yes. I loved the farm and the animals. The fresh cream and butter.” But, things were not meant to be, so she had to sell the farm, giving what she could afford to my hubby’s father and moved back home with her parents. Shortly after that, my husband’s father took the money, moved to Alaska and eventually committed suicide. All my hubby ever knew of him were his writings and poetry. From the sounds of him, though it might sound harsh, he was better without his influence.

When my MIL returned home with her child to the family home, her parents were kind enough to buy a plot of land down the road from them on the water. They began to build a house for her, which she got to have some say in the design. When it was near completion, there was an argument with the the ‘evil grandfather’ about a dog my MIL had that had been attacked by the evil grandfather’s dog and had to be put down. He blamed my MIL for having to have her own dog put down and kicked her out. The family still owns that house, but she and my hubby never once lived in it.

So, she had to start all over again. But, I think having had some say in the design of that house intrigued her for she was to design and build two other houses that she and my hubby and SIL lived in, including the one she now has, that my hubby mostly grew up in.

I also admire my MIL take on the hippies. She was born in 1942 so was really there at the first cusp of the hippie generation, but her response to it was more about the freedoms and color of fashion and the new ‘return to nature’ ideals that lead her to a farm. She never got into the mindless drug binges and orgies that she saw around her. In fact, I love the story of her trip to Woodstock. While most hitchhiked or took the VW bus, my MIL went in her Jaguar, found it too muddy and stayed in a hotel. That was the end of that scene for her. And, quite honestly, I don’t blame her, I might have done the same thing!

As I have said, my MIL is the opposite of a braggart. Though she could go on about the things she has done and seen, most of it we get from asking or stories from others. She even recently, though she is in her 60’s, sailed their 45’ boat down to Florida from MA, which is an amazing adventure that took weeks. She will tell you of her white knuckled fear at the swell of some of the big waves, but for the most part takes it all in stride as ‘no big deal’. So, I think what I most love about my MIL is her ability to do things well because she felt she wanted to, that she needed to make a safe comforting trusting home for her children because she did NOT have it, yet never played the “I never had it like that when I was a kid” to her children. Perhaps those are the best role models, those who quietly live amazingly, but would scoff at your admiring her for anything. So, I am lucky in my MIL. She is a fine woman indeed.

I hope, in my hubby’s choice of me, that I hold some of those very same qualities and perhaps that is why he was drawn to me. I do know I love talking plants and gardening with her. She is always praising me for my various own crazy adventures with cooking, or raising chickens, or building a barn. She gives me praise and credit as if she could never imagine doing it herself, when I know, for a fact, she has done more and done it well. But, really, that is a sign of a good mother figure, to praise and encourage through your own abilities and attempts and help along the way.

Here is one of my favorite pictures of my MIL with my Hubby as a boy on their boat. I just think it shows the love and adventure she instilled in her children.

Well, that is the saga of my MIL. My hubby is on vacation this week and we had originally planned a big trip. We decided it was silly to waste the money and have been having a lovely time enjoying our home here on Cape. Yesterday we went to a wonderful old used book store we hadn’t been to in awhile and I found two lovely books that I will share with you tomorrow. I will also share my Fish chowder recipe. It was the first time I have ever made homemade chowder and was happy with the results.

Until, then, happy homemaking!

17 November 1955 “Why I like my Mother in Law”

I quickly mentioned yesterday, while taking a break from my little kitchen, that I was preparing a dinner for my MIL birthday. It was a success, but when I returned in the evening I had a question from a commenter about my relationship with my MIL and how she, in the future, could herself become a good MIL.

Well, as sometimes happens, in my attempt to rattle off my opinion, (which I seem to be always full of!) mingled with late night fatigue I managed to press a wrong button and all my ‘wisdom’ was for naught. It was lost to the great void of deleted or misdirected comments in the blogosphere. I wonder if there is such a place, perhaps it has become the reading for ghosts and others ‘caught between the veil’?

So, as often happens with you darling readers, you got me thinking. I had begun to consider why it is I do like my MIL so much. Even though my initial response is now the reading material of ghosts, I have thought about it more and consider it would be post-worthy.

It also got me thinking how much more, most likely, the MIL played in the role of the 1950’s homemaker. She was most likely more a figure to be dealt with and rather you liked or loathed her, she was a major input in your own homemaking life.

As most women ‘back then’ were homemakers, you were most likely to inherit a MIL who also had her own schedules, recipes and ideas on how to run a home and raise children. IF she were overbearing and the type who thought, ‘no one is good enough for my dear boy’ then you probably suffered through. But, even if that were the case, you most likely learned some things.

It seemed once we women dwelled in a close knit world of ancient wisdom handed down generation to generation. How to cook a chicken, what is the best way to remove a grease stain, how do you get the whitest whites? Even, how do you keep the parlor maid out of the sherry. We were a vast world of knowledge and practical skills handed down and mingled from mother and grandmother and then mixed up a bit with the MIL. Yet, we were very much a sorority of sisterhood. When you entered into the married state as a homemaker, you most likely brought with you knowledge from your mother and grandmother. Mixed in with that knowledge was of course the knowledge and know-how of their mothers and grandmothers. And, with your marriage in most cases, came the MIL. She, herself, was most likely a homemaker.

Regardless of class, as well, a woman was the maker of the home.  If she had a staff of servants under a housekeeper, she still was the ruler of the roost. She okayed meal plans, arranged dinner parties, and made sure things were done properly. So, in a way, she shared a sisterly bond with the farmers wife or the bankers wife who may have had a girl who came in once a week or simply able daughters. They all had the knowledge and ability to run the home.

Now, back to the MIL. I am lucky in my MIL in that I live her very much; love her even. I give her a kiss on the cheek upon greeting and leaving and always refer to her as ‘mum’. In some ways, I am happy for her role in my life, as my own mother, ravaged by Alzheimer's for some years now, is for all intents and purposes gone from me.

Now, my MIL is probably not a run of the mill sort, if there is such a thing. She has done, as evidenced by my lovely hubby, a great job in raising her children. But, perhaps she has not done so in any orthodox fashion. They did not grow up with the constancy of a father (my hubby’s father died when he was but 3) but she was the constant. She nurtured them in their passions. When my hubby decided to play piano, he had lessons and pianos followed up to the grand we still now own that he plays upon. His sister did dance and ballet and even followed that dream to Walnut Hill, a boarding school for the arts here in MA.

It is odd, as in many ways my hubby and his sister were given much freedom as youngsters and teens. Yet, as they grew, they were treated in a mature fashion. They ate at table, they lived in a clean and orderly house. They had respect for one another and learned the value of money through their various chores. In High School, my hubby had no curfew, yet on his own would make the decision to call his mother if he were running late. Or, as he has told me, often chose to get home early on school nights because he knew he had to be ready for class the next day. These were decisions he was making on his own at 15 when I see many people today in their 30’s unable to make such decisions.

So, somehow her mix of freedom combined with mature responsible expectations of her children caused them to be kind and considerate with an amazing work ethic. They had a stay at home mother who kept an immensely neat home and made homemade delicious meals. It seems the very act of example one of the greatest teaching elements. For example, when we were first together I was amazed at how neat and tidy my hubby was with his clothes, much like the video from the 1950’s I once showed here: Clothes removed, if still clean, hung and buttoned on hangers, dirty clothes in hampers. He even folded his underpants. Though his mother was not the type to always preach, “You must do this or that” by her very act of doing it herself, keeping a neat well decorated home, planning meals and paying bills on time, maintaining her property, caring and cherishing antiques that had belonged to ancestors, her children learned to dwell in such a pace.

That is why I know, were I to ever have a child of my own, I would have to make sure our house was never chaos. I know that may sound like someone speaking who has no child, but I know my MIL had two children underfoot and kept a clean home, well decorated with antiques that one and two year old children lived in and learned not to break or scratch or ruin but still had a joyous childhood. In fact, by their very toys being handmade or passed down antiques, they learned to care for these toys which probably held up much better than new plastic toys!

Recently, a friend of ours invited her friend to a little party at our home. She mentioned how she loved our little antique house and commented how everything was ‘just so’. How antique books and old photographs and delicate things such as great grandmother’s fan sat just so on the piano next the bust. “You must not have children”, was her comment. I thought about that and realized, my MIL home is very much like this, even more so for she has a much larger house and many more antiques. My hubby and his sister grew up in such a place and the ‘nice things’ were always out. They were what you lived with. They were not just ‘special occasions’ or a mad dash to make an appearance for company, it was HOW you lived. They ate with the actual silver it wasn’t just kept for holidays.

I know I would do the same. I would want my child to know their history and to respect the furniture and past, and it would not have to be in a stifleling  way. It isn’t about sitting in velvet sofas in constrictive clothes not being allowing to touch, it is about living in well planned rooms filled with beautiful things that you can touch, but some things need to be handled carefully. And isn’t that really a great lesson for life and relationships? We should feel comfortable and lived in our life but we should realize some things are more delicate or need more caution and tact. We shouldn’t have one way for company and a half attempt at it for our daily life. We DESERVE to live as if company is coming everyday. And, if raised in such a way, the beauty and delicacy of everyday is more apparent to us no matter where we are.

If we dwell and raise our children in a chaos of plastic throw away world of things higgledy-piggedly, what are we teaching them about things and people? Chaos and laziness are fine, but put on a ‘false face’ when company comes? A home filled with cheap plastic toys and throw away items, eating upon paper plates balanced on laps, grease on shirts, clothes piled where ever. That is a chaos that can do nothing but breed more chaos. It sounds stifling, but I know it is not. My hubby grew up happy and content in a world of clean orderly beauty and he had fun, respected his surroundings but always felt comfortable. I think this sort of life also makes one feel they can feel comfort in the world no matter what life throws at them. Simply organize the chaos, fold away your troubles and deal with each thing with a delicate hand if need be and know your place in the world is right. A lesson I cannot imagine being bad for anyone, especially children to learn.

That is not to say there is mess and spills and accidents, but I know my hubby grew up, even as  a small boy, in a bedroom that was decorated with antiques that are still in his mother’s home today. When he wanted a poster or some modern element, it was thought about and incorporated into the room. As we age, we put away those old things, but to have the security of that antique bed or that old desk that your grandfather used at university, that is a solidity worth having. Even if we do not have such antiques we can find things with a history, even if it is not our own, and share that with a child. They will learn to respect it and want to keep and cherish it in the future with their own children.

Think how in many ways it would be cheaper even than Wal-Mart to go to a yard sale or junk shop and get an old desk that is actually wooden solidly built. Redo it, paint it, stain it or even have your child help you with it. This is an adult desk and the child is but 4 or 5. If he now has this desk, solidly built, a part of his life it will have meaning. He will need to sit properly at it on the chair and use it like an adult. He will want to care for it and not scribble upon it with crayons, because it is his special thing. He will need to keep his pencils and crayons organized in a cup or try in the desk, paper put away in the drawer carefully. This one piece of furniture could teach your child so much about life. Things in their place and ordered makes a happy life and more time to do what you like as you are not always chasing your tail to keep it clean. Respect your things and others things as if they are your own. When you sit her it is to do work, rather it is hard work like learning to read, or fun work like practicing your drawing. It is a place that things get done or your dreams are dreamt, but it has a purpose and must be kept orderly as you should keep your life and thoughts.

He may take this away with him when he has his own home and children. Compare that with buying ‘cheap’ things at a chain store that fall apart. It might sound silly, but such a simple little act and decision really could affect a person. Their understanding of money, value of things, its relationship to people can start and be affected by the simple act of living in our homes and how we relate to it and those who we live with.

I think that is why so many adults today long for and pay high prices for the toys of their youth, even if they are plastic. It was the only solid tactile bit of their past that they can hold onto. When we should be recalling good times or a piece of furniture that meant something, we have to hold onto plastic totes of plastic toys that somehow represent a lost bit of our life filed away for company while we dwell in chaos everyday.

But, I digress and am getting a bit off track…

So, apart from her good job at raising up my hubby, I like my MIL. I respect her as a person and would, even if it were not due to our familial connection through marriage, enjoy being her friend.

I think I will write more tomorrow on my MIL as a person and why I respect her, so to be continued…

16 November 1955 “Just a quick Hello, Gals”

I am busy in the kitchen today, gals. It is my MIL birthday and we are planning a trip over to cook her a meal and celebrate there. I would much rather do that than take her out and I think the food will be better.
I am making a Cape Cod fish chowder (recipe tomorrow) and with the extra cod and halibut I baked that to serve on a salad. I am making my homemade cheese crackers to eat with the hearty chowder and finishing with simple chocolate dipped coconut macaroons and coffee. Simple, but hearty and delicious.

I just wanted to touch base with all of you and know I am thinking of you today in my kitchen.

Here is a fun little short about the housewife.

And, just for fun, don’t you adore this kitchen nook? I just love that color! I have predominately yellow and red with touches of this in my current 50’s kitchen, but as we need to do our floor over (old house and floor beam rot!) next spring, there will be more of this color in. It matches my every day dishes.

Have a great day, all. Keep the Apron Revolution alive!

14 November 1955 “More Vintage Thanksgiving and the Relative Merits of ‘Better’”

This movie is worth the twelve minutes to watch it. I cannot tell if it is made just before we are in WWII or immediately after we are out, but you can tell that part of the sentiment is affected by the reaction to the Fascism of the war torn world.

There are many good things about this short. For one, it shows the blue collar middle class, not always shown in such films. It looks as if Dad is a mechanic. Or, perhaps he worked in an auto factory (something our American Car companies seemed to think more important to move out of our own country. Again, I think it funny that there is a BMW plant now in our country, but most American companies still outsource. Especially after they were bailed out!)

I like that simple things are appreciated such as free library books, safe warm baths for baby, a private home-though it is mortgaged and needs ‘a lick of paint’.

When the neighbor drops by for flour, the mother is ‘allowed’ to talk about whatever she likes, i.e. they are not in fear of their opinions of politics and economy as was the case in Europe before and during the war.

I feel, again, that this shows a time in our country or maybe the world where we were perched on a great place to realize what technology had done for us and could do and yet to still be human. To love and understand our own needs and not feel we NEED more than we can afford. To appreciate that what IS available for us in our various monetary brackets/class could be good enough for happiness and family. The need to want more and more seems not as apparent.

This got me thinking about a comment someone made the other day about the term ‘Better’ being relative. I really have to agree. Certainly, today we have more advances in medicine and even more labor saving devices. There is plenty of food to go around and cheap clothing to be had by all. Yet, there are things missing in today’s ‘better’. I think common courtesy, kindness, community, neighborliness, self-education, fortitude, self-ability, a sense of place, contentment with simplicity.

Somehow we have become a nation reaching for some brass ring that is always dangled and can only be had by spending more than we have. Yet, we don’t look down and see we are merely on a conveyor belt of consumerism or that sometimes we are trampling on others to get that brass ring. That cheap shirt is easy to get, but don’t look to close at those in China and India making it for us. Nor, avert your eyes to the many small business that can’t ever compete. Keep your blinders on to your own neighborhoods and downtowns, as they fall to ruin and the great concrete chain stores mar up and ugly the American landscape. Pine for better things! And, when you wish for the old days, just pretend they are gone forever because it is easier to just go along with things the way they are!

Now, I am not saying ‘The good ole days were better’ because that is not entirely true. And it only pining for the old days or thinking we can recreate them because we buy things and put them on shelves is not the answer either. The actual good things, those ‘BETTER” times were about caring for your neighbor and your neighborhood, your family and your diet and your home and your bank account. The things we pine for from the past CAN be brought back, I know they can. Certainly, it is hard to fight nation-wide against endless reality shows that give fame to spoiled idiots who seem to think the louder you are and the more you are concerned about ME the better you are. We can help to draw these role models away from the young, but we really do need to start at home.

Sometimes just a simple thing can make a difference. Buy something from a local business, farm, store. Sure, you might not like or have a vintage dress, but you have nice clothes, put those on and make yourself 'Thanksgiving day’ pretty and be surprised by the smiles and help you get from strangers and store clerks. Make two of your pizza in front of the TV days a sit down as a family at a table day and see you suddenly have conversation instead of ‘comments on TV shows’.

I am more determined everyday, as the year closes, to try and see how much I feel I can really make 1955 be about today! To try and consciously make decisions that can at least change my sphere of the world into those qualities that I love and admire from the good ole’ days. So, that my Better can be both the equality and technology of today, but also the love, respect, and human quality of Better from those days. There is no reason that modern life can coincide with those attitudes and lifestyle changes of the past. One is not the opposite of the other. Only, as is true with most things worth doing, it will be harder than just ‘going with the flow’. But, at the end of the day and the end of my days, I want to think I lived the best I could for myself and others and the world, not just coasted along easy and uncaring. Anyone else up for the ride?

12 November 1955 “The Misunderstood Decade and Thanksgiving Preparation?”

This is apropos of nothing, but I just thought it a darling ad. I guess the illustrative style, the interior of the house, the party atmosphere, it just seemed very evocative of the age. There is something almost innocent about this ad, where it simply shows people gathering and enjoying the product. NO hidden message or ‘sex sells’ undertone. Just cute animation, simple message, and fun music.

A bit of news:

NAACP Protest At City Hall After Black Woman Attacked in A Church - Jet Magazine, November 10, 1955. Again, we see white and black people in this protest. I honestly feel that the 1950s always gets the rap for being racist. And then, suddenly sometime in 1960’s, magically everyone was aware and being more ‘cool about it’. While, really, the laws and law makers were speaking for our country as a whole and it was in the 1950’s post war time that racism and unfair treatment was being questioned. There were many Japanese war brides who also faced much hatred and unfairness, but our hatred of the Japanese had to be questioned when the next door neighbor was married to a Japanese woman who turned out to be your friend.

I guess, as I have said before, since starting my project I want to make clear more about the 1950’s. It seems to be a period in which so many are fascinated and yet it is so misunderstood. In many ways it is stereotyped as Poodle skirts, malt shops, and everyone mindlessly doing the same thing, that seems to be the idea. A decade of repression and oppression. And then here comes along the 1960’s to save us all from the horrible ‘rules of the man’.

I no longer buy into this stereo-type of the two decades. Really, in the 1950’s there was so much innovation, free thinking, freedoms and experimentation in art and architecture. It was such a pivotal time and, as I have said, it seems to be that pinpoint in modern technological time that was on the brink of getting it right.

Somehow, even though the 1960’s were suppose to be anti-establishment, we now are so all encompassed into a system that exists solely to provide for the establishment of large corporations which basically supply the government with its politicians. I guess that is why I really like to use the 1950’s now as a modern time frame in which to borrow and look back to try and think, how can I copy it in ways and then tweak it as if we are making a very different choice back then to end on a happier healthier future now!  Well, enough of that…

Fun ad for this metal stool.

I have this very same stool and I love it. There is just something so evocative about it. I did not know that they also made little tea carts, as you can see on the bottom of the ad. That would be a handy addition to my kitchen. I will have to keep my eyes peeled at local thrift sales.

I promised to list my petite fours recipe, so here it is:

As Thanksgiving approaches for we Americans, I wonder how many of you might try Vintage recipes? Probably, in America, Thanksgiving and Christmas are probably the times when many vintage recipes resurface in the form of ‘classic food’.

This is such a sweet movie and I was going to wait until Thanksgiving to post it, but thought it might be nice to get our ideas going for the up coming holiday.

You can see how the bird in this movie is definitely pre-hormone/genetically altered as today mass market poultry farms produce. I wonder if the taste was different?

I like how they have a pudding for dessert. We sometimes have a Christmas pudding, but usually have pies and such for Thanksgiving. What I really noticed was the portions. Another aspect of today’s Thanksgiving is overeating and having too much food! Here, we see a small dessert that would be considered one serving for today and yet, here it serves the whole family. Interesting, don’t you think? Do you overeat on Thanksgiving? I might rethink the amount of desserts for this year’s festivities.

 

 

 

 

9 November 1955 “Some News and bits and bobs”

1 November-A time bomb explodes in the cargo hold of United Airlines Flight 629, a Douglas DC-6B airliner flying above Longmont, Colorado, killing all 39 passengers and 5 crew members on board.

I found this bit about the crash. It sort of tugs at your heart.

Captain Hall announced flying time of about three hours and simultaneously advised the passengers that weather was clear and calm. As the modern aircraft flew over the small city of Longmont, Colorado, just 30 miles from Wyoming, Captain Hall switched on the autopilot and asked one of the stewardesses for a cup of coffee. He checked the instrumentation panel, which showed all indicators were normal and aircraft systems functioning properly.

His first inkling that something had gone wrong was a loud bang that seemed to emanate from somewhere under and behind the aircraft. Captain Hall heard the noise and then felt a deep shudder that lasted a fraction of a second. Then his seat suddenly came up off the floor of the plane and crashed into the metal ceiling of the cockpit. Below him, traveling at several hundred miles per hour, the aircraft erupted into one gigantic blast that ripped the fuselage apart into a thousand pieces sending debris, luggage and passengers tumbling into space. Since the fuel tanks were almost filled to capacity, an immense fireball detonated, beginning in the lower section of the plane, which momentarily enveloped the entire aircraft.

Both engines separated from the wings and the propellers continued to turn as they began their long, spinning descent to the ground below. As the fiery debris plummeted to Earth, several other smaller explosions shattered the remaining parts of the aircraft. Tiny, white-hot bits of metal, similar to the pattern of fireworks, cascaded into the cool November air. These pieces, along with the passengers and their belongings, scattered across several square miles of Weld County in northern Colorado.        

There would be no survivors of United Airlines flight 629.

I wonder if there will be a point in our future when we no longer rely on fossil fuels such as gas and have air travel that uses solar or some other form of safer energy. Will those people look back at us hurtling ourselves down roads and through the air in metal objects filled with flammable gas as insane! It is, honestly, sort of scary when you think of it in that terms.

3 November- The five-and-one-half-mile long Rimutaka Railroad tunnel opens in New Zealand.

5 November- Racial segregation is outlawed on trains and buses in Interstate Commerce in the United States. This is a precursor to the incident to come in December, when Rosa Parks refuses to give up her seat to a white person. This outlawing of segregation was on interstate bus lines. It is a beginning to the change that is about to come to our country. I think what so sad, is the majority of Americans, particularly at this post war time, were probably against segregation and ill treatment of blacks, yet the laws spoke for the whites as a whole. Many unfortunate raids and riots ensue that hurt both white and black poor and middle class all because of laws not truly supported by the people. I suppose it is another example of how dangerous it is to just allow the government to ‘speak for us’.

I found this cartoon in one of my vintage magazines. I think it really speaks to the movement towards our over consuming and accumulation of stuff. Really, this is a BRAND NEW phenomenon. The post war middle class is growing and separating into the nuclear family we are now familiar with. While the parents of this time, someone my age in 1955, would have had a few toys, mostly wood or porcelain dolls, and certainly hand me downs from relatives, possibly a grandparent or more relatives living in one house, sharing childcare etc, we begin to separate the family unit and therefore less sharing is possible. The need for more toys is there. Cheap plastic things are coming out of Japan as it now comes out of China. So, this concept of your child having SO many toys that he carelessly just leaves them in driveways was a new concept. And, while it seems funny, in some ways it almost gives me a little chill.

I think, as I go through my 1955 day I realize it is not truly 1955, yet there are moments when it seems real. I will be home alone, vintage ‘radio program’ on, sipping tea in my vintage clothes, reading my vintage magazines, completely immersed in the moment. It will have a unique reality to it. Then I will come across something like this and for a moment it is as if I am suddenly a clairvoyant in 1955 getting a flash into the future! It sort of scares me, as I see through the innocence of 1955 to where we actually are now, here in 2009!

  This was a sweet little advert in the back of one of my vintage magazines for yeast. What I found so interesting is that it shows a mother teaching her son to bake. We are so often lead to believe how strict the gender roles were in the 1950s. Yet, here is a mother teaching her son to cook and a son so proud of it that he wins a ribbon at the fair and gets into a magazine. Another example of how important homemaking skills are to ALL of us. Cute, don’t you think? I wonder if this boy, now an old man, ever still cooks/bakes?

And to end this random post on a happy ending, I found this picture on someone's blog and fell in love with it. I just love ALL these dresses. What I like is how they are very similar in length and overall style, yet look at all the individuality amongst them! I adore the brown one with the horses and the two tone blue striped one, is just darling. This is from 1955 and not sure what they are doing, but whatever it is, it sure is in style.

Yesterday, at the fabric store, Gussie and I were both in vintage clothes, hats, gloves etc. A woman came up to us and looked at us. Then she stood there a moment and said, “Okay, can I ask?” We both looked at her and said, “sure” and she said nothing. She just kept looking at us. Then she said, “What is the occasion?” I told her I always dress like that and she said she felt, when she walked in, like she was ‘in a movie’ and smiled and walked away. I also had a nice lady walk up to me when I was trying tulle over my hat to consider it for a future hat and she asked my opinion on hat making. Again, most of the response I get from people is happy and positive. It is amazing what fashion can do for other people, just imagine how they would feel if they actually wore vintage themselves! A powerful force, fashion.

7 November 1955 “Touching Base”

Hi gals! Just touching base with you for a quick Coffee Klatch.

I have been very busy these past few days and have been battling a UTI. I know it isn’t polite to talk of such things in mixed company, but over coffee and a visit, we gals understand.

Some women are just more prone to UTI/Kidney Infections and unfortunately, I am one of those. I started researching when antibiotics were readily available from your doctor, and it looks as those I would have been able to get some form of them from my doctor. I am, now, currently on two kinds as I put it off a bit too long, but you know how a gal gets so busy!

Tonight I am trying out my new birthday mixer and baking up a double batch of my feather fudge cake. I have been asked to supply desserts for hubby for another meeting/celebration for someone at work. I am also going to make some of my chocolate dipped coconut macaroons. Always a crowd pleaser and so easy (See my birthday tea for recipe!)

I also have told a couple of my friends that I would get some things ready for a ‘craft fair’ they are going to be involved in at our local farm next Sunday. Normally, I would look to my paintings etc, but I am going to, instead, sew up some aprons and decorate them with embroidery and other things. If they work out, I will post picks. I cannot find a pattern for a type I would like to try, so may have to make one up. Tomorrow I am going to get some fabric to try these out.

So, with the sickness, baking, and preparing for a craft fair, I have been unable to really focus on a post. I will do so, soon, though I promise.

How are all of you and what have you been up to? Any good recipes or tips to share?

4 November 1955 “Questions and Answers Part Three of Three”

  Well, back to the remainder of my questions I answered for a reader of mine for a paper she is doing. This is the last of them, so hopefully you enjoy them.

• Do you prefer the life of the 1950’s housewife, or do you prefer the life of the modern women? Why is this?

I have come to find, through my project, that there are many ‘modern’ women who are in fact housewives/homemakers. My personal experience is different in my wardrobe and various household appliances being vintage and trying to allow myself only access to 1955 literature, movies, tv, magazines etc. So, there is an element of the ‘housewife’ still about. So with that said, I think I would have to say without a doubt, and I didn’t think this would have been the case when I started this project, that I prefer the life of the 1950’s housewife.

Perhaps I should clarify that: I prefer my VERSION of a 1950’s housewife. I realize as a modern woman and one who is trying to ‘recreate’ a time past, that I have a certain perspective and options that the ‘real deal’ 1955 homemaker may not have had. I have that advantage over her. Yet, she had at her disposal an arsenal of training that would have been expected of her. Years at mother and grandmother’s knee learning skills. These same skills would have been studied further in Home Ec at both High School and College level. Something I have come to believe is important now at the  High School level.

I was amazed at my own lack of very basic skills and it was not only me, but many in my generation and earlier and later generations have a great gap in their ‘practical home based’ knowledge. There appears to be almost no emphasis on  basic cooking knowledge, cleaning and scheduling your day, finance and money management. It’s odd to me that so many young people are going to be expected to hop on the “student loan” train and almost nothing is taught to them about options or how this debt could impact their lives or how frugal living or doing for yourself could ease that same burden. But, I digress…

So, with that said, I think this version of my own present mingled with a ‘studied’ 1950’s past is preferable to what I had before the project. I have, this year, been living in a sort of ‘time bubble’ of the past, but still affected somewhat by the present. This, however, has been a great tool to allow be to view, side by side, the two eras and how we got from point A to point B. This compare/contrast lifestyle has really opened my eyes to my world, my country, and where we are currently in terms of economy and interpersonal relationships.

The level of skill I feel I am attaining mingled with the increased feeling of self-reliance has me not wanting to turn back to the more ‘lazy’ ways of the 21st century. There is still so much I want to learn and do that is in the vein of the 1950’s that I cannot let it go at the end of this year and the project. I feel my future life will eventually become my own version of modernity and 1950s. I could never turn back into that person I was in 2008. I DON’T want too!

• What does your typical day in 1955 involve? (provide as much detail as you see fit).

I am up with the alarm. I grab my dressing gown, sometimes I am in curlers from the night before so I don a scarf or my hair is still ‘set enough’ to give it touch ups later. I go into the kitchen and immediately set my ‘modern electric percolator’ (it is from the 1950’s and cost me all of a dollar I believe at a local sale, makes wonderful coffee and looks pretty on the table).

Next I begin breakfast. This is usually a full breakfast. It can be pancakes or waffles (both homemade completely and I have a vintage waffle iron that is actually from the late 1930’s and works wonderfully)eggs, bacon or sausage, toast, homemade jam etc. Grapefruit sliced with cherry is a summer time treat, but in the winter it is more hot cereal with dried fruit. But, we are both egg lovers and they often feature in the breakfast, rather simply fried or scrambled or my specialty, Eggs Benedict ( I am particularly proud of my Hollandaise sauce, also homemade.)

Then, while breakfast is on, I begin packing my husbands lunch. We save quite a bit in our budget by my doing this and I enjoy it. It often consists of leftovers from the previous day’s meal. I sometimes plan on cooking a little extra or will eat a little less (which will help with the waistline) to have leftovers for this purpose. Or, if there is a roast going or leftover chicken I will make sandwiches with that or egg salad etc. NO store bought lunchmeat for us. It is too expensive and doesn’t taste as good. Of course I do use tuna or salmon in a can sometimes.

Next, after lunch is packed, breakfast is done and plated and put in the oven on warm. I set the table: linen napkins, full silverware, glasses for Orange Juice and Milk, coffee cups. There is a pitcher of cream for coffee, one for milk if there is cereal. I stopped putting the container the cream or milk comes in, as it seems an ugly presence with my china. As the eating at table evolved, the presentation just became normal and now I expect and enjoy a table well set without the distraction of ‘store-bought’ packaging.  By the time I have finished all this, my husband is usually dressed and shaved and we sit down to breakfast. As I am writing this I realize how normal this all seems to me now, but a year ago it would never happen. There was getting up whenever, rushing about, maybe grabbing a bowl of cold cereal. What I love about our breakfasts now, is it is such a great start to the day. We can sit civilized, enjoy a great breakfast (if I do say so myself) and actually have a conversation before we start our day. We often discuss what we both need to get done with our days of ‘work’ and then try to remember anything that needs to get done, but we also end up discussing interesting things, politics, the books we are reading, etc. I can’t imagine our ever NOT doing this anymore. Even on day’s off, we do this. We rarely go out to breakfast anymore and I often find myself not actually enjoying it as much as being at home. The modern world often talks of ‘you deserve it, pamper yourself’ which of course always means going someplace and spending money to have other people, who don’t care about you, take care of you. Yet, simple inexpensive things such as setting your table with nice dishes (also does not have to be expensive, my vintage china set was very inexpensive) sometimes dressing for dinner, sitting in the dining room at a table to discuss your life. These are things I now find important to my day and that I deserve to live thus. I don’t want to have to ‘get away’ from my daily life, I want to enjoy it as if I AM being pampered, even if much of it comes from my own hand.

After breakfast in a very 1950’s style, hubby gets his packed lunch, vintage thermos of coffee and a kiss and he is off. Then my day really begins.

Most of my days have a certain structure to them every week and then ‘extras’ get filled in as things come up. For example, Monday is Wash Day, Tuesday is Ironing Day, Wednesdays are the Floors (vacuuming and mopping etc of course through out the week I will vacuum as needed, but this is the day furniture gets moved, the stairs get done, corners really get the dust mop). Fridays are the bathrooms as well as Mondays. But this is just the general skeleton of my week, there is marketing and errands thrown in as well and those are dealt out for the day by a few minutes in my little sitting room with my cup of coffee from breakfast and my little notepad.

I also write my blog usually in the morning after Hubby has left for work or at least get it started. Though I don’t post every day, I am writing or researching a post everyday. It is very much a part of my ‘work day’. I have found this year’s schedule the best thing to getting things done. It is hard to procrastinate when you have so much to do! And you find little time to regret your day, when only getting half of your list done still surpasses what I might have done in a week in my past.

Yesterday, for example, was ironing day. So, as I turned on the radio (a radio repro that looks old but I play old music and old radio station on cd.) and began my ironing, I will also work on other things. I have been needing to get back to my sewing, so I might take  a few minutes and look through my patterns and yesterday was a good day to cut out a dress. It is even better to actually sew on ironing day, as you often need to ‘press seams and hems’ as you sew and having everything out and ready is always helpful. Right now I have to turn the dinning room into my sewing room/ironing room, but I am lucky to have an out building that I plan to convert to my studio/workroom. There I can revel in having places specifically for sewing/ironing/artwork etc. It will aide my in my housework immensely.

Now, I also always give myself a lunch break. As I have been wanting to shed pounds, lately this has been cottage cheese and pineapple on toast or something along those lines and I always make a pot of tea to sip. I will settle into a corner with my tea and usually peruse my vintage magazines. Making notes of things for posts or ideas for my home, such as noting page numbers and month of magazine so I can find it later. And it is a time that I go through my various vintage cookbooks for ideas for menus, things I would like to try in the future. This is important as this affects my marketing for the coming week. Yesterday, for example, I decided next week I am going to try a week of ‘one dish meals’ I found in one of my cookbooks. So, I went through and jotted down anything special I might not already have stocked, so it can be adjusted into my weekly grocery budget.

This is a very important time, I feel, because it allows me to recharge and it really lets me appreciate the joy of being a homemaker. It also says to me: This IS a job.  Making one’s own schedule and working out the day can be harder than people think. It would be rather easy to become lazy, but as you challenge yourself and realize what you can do, your days open up to you full of promise and you can’t imagine sitting and not doing something for too long. Or when you do relax, you can feel pride in what you have accomplished and dream of what you would like to challenge yourself with next.

Then round about 4 0r 5 I will begin preparing dinner. I usually have a rough idea of what I am going to cook each day, as it helps in my shopping, but the kitchen and I are such old friends now that I feel, much as I have in the past in my art studio, that it is such a natural place to be, often just walking in will inspire me to cook this or that. I usually have a dessert going and this is usually done twice a week. I try to have dessert day coincide with an easy meal, so yesterday I wanted to make a cake and frosting, so dinner was a simple meatloaf with a baked rice and vegtable side dish. This was easy to throw together ahead of time, pop in the fridge and then I could work on my cake. Then while the cake was cooling, the oven was hot and in went dinner. When you are as involved in your weekly meals as being a homemaker allows you to be, the concept of waste and leftovers is greatly changed. Meatloaf, for example, is a great vehicle to use up old bread crusts etc. I have a shelf in my fridge that holds ‘waiting leftovers’ to become ingredients in other meals. You will find, too, that you will try things on a whim, as opposed to only following recipes, to discover what works and what doesn’t. This sort of feels as if you have gone to the next level of food prep in that you are creating your own recipe.

Then I go about and try to do a good cleanup so the house is not all sixes and sevens when hubby gets home. I used to laugh at the old homemakers manuals saying, “Make sure the house is nice for hubby when he gets there” and my modern response was, “Yeah, why doesn’t he do it!” But now, I realize how hard it is to go out and work a job, I have done it myself, even run my own business, so I appreciate his hard day at work enough to say ‘thank you’ by not coming home to a messy house. We probably talk and have more together time now because of this lifestyle. When he comes home we can have time to have a cocktail or glass of wine while dinner is finishing (I may have already set the table or I will do it while he tells me about his day) and then we sit down and eat a full homemade meal at a nicely set table and discuss our day. This one simple thing, meal at a table, makes such a difference from the ‘modern version’ of eating in front of the TV.

Afterwards, he often goes to his study to read and write a bit (he collects and uses antique typewriters) while I clean up. It would have been normal for a husband to help the wife with dishes at this time, but as I have the luxury of a dishwasher , des rigueur in 1955, I find it easier to do this alone. I actually prefer to have the kitchen be my province and my husband rarely even needs to go in there unless he wants to snack from the fridge, which he rarely does.

After the kitchen is cleaned and table wiped up, I go into my little sitting room off our little kitchen and work more on my blog posts. Later in the evening we come together and sit and read or talk or sometimes watch TV ( I have vintage shows on dvd such as Father Knows Best etc). I might even try my needlepoint or work on the hem of a dress. Then every evening we usually read an hour or so in bed and then lights out and it starts all over again.

I rather like this life. The old modern me HATED wiht a passion routine. I didn’t mind working that much, but was never happy. Even when I tried my hand at being a business owner, I never felt ‘satisfied or fulfilled’. We have moved a lot and done various things and yet I find being a homemaker the most rewarding. Perhaps it is because it entails SO much, creativity, imagination, hard work,  always learning new skills and pushing your existing skills to the limit, the list goes on. It is a good life.

Can you tell me a story of an incident that has occurred during this time? (perhaps an incident with the public, with getting the girdles on etc)

I have thought about this one and there are so many incidences that I have written about in my blog. They are rather longwinded, but my encounters in public have run the gamut from being sniggered at in a Mall by teens (who were wearing what would be considered basically ‘Hobo Costumes’ in 1955) as I strolled by in veiled hat, white gloves and seamed stockings and full ‘New Look’ dress to an elderly gentleman in an antique store almost tearing up and thanking me for ‘looking so well turned out’. It made him smile and then I too smiled.

My most recent encounter was a trip to our local antique store. I was dressed as usual and it happened to be a Sunday. I had Gussie in tow with me as well and she was also dressed 1950’s that day. The woman asked if I was involved in a fashion show, to which I replied, “My life is a fashion show”. She laughed.

I once, early on, was at a 1950’s Diner we frequent with friends when I became rather ill feeling. I was not yet used to the more restrictive Girdle I had on that day so I had to excuse myself to the Ladies room and remove it, roll it carefully with my stockings (as they would not work without the attached garters and I was not wearing a garter belt that day, as the girdle had the attached garters)into the pocket of my swing coat. Thank goodness it was cold enough to have my large coat. We laughed about it later and I have a variety of Girdles I wear now, some more ‘freer’ than others. It depends on what I am wearing and the occasion. I find if I need to wear the Merry Widow it is to make a nicer dress fit well and I then eat less and am less hungry. It is the most like a corset (and I have worn Victorian Corsets in the past so I know!)

But, for the most part I would say I have received positive responses from people. Many strangers will comment on my ‘style’. I think in our modern homogenized plugged in world a bit of uniqueness really affects other people. 

• How has it been adapting to the way of life of the 50’s? What has been the hardest and the easiest aspects?

In the beginning there was a rush of excitement. I know look back and see it was another outlet for the modern “consumer me”. I was able to find vintage appliances and clothes, decorative items. IT was fun, but I look back now and still see that as the very modern me. Not that I should not have fun furnishing my home, but my concept of a ‘new time’ meant, “what could I buy”?

After that settled in, I was also lucky to have a close friend who was very into it with me. This allowed us to go crazy with girdle shopping etc and having someone else be a part of it helped me ease my way into it. I think one of the hardest parts was later learning this friend, whom I thought was close with me, actually felt a sudden need to distance herself. That was the hardest. I think the more I really realized how much our modern world is so made up of consuming and how much I felt lied to by the very modern attitude of shopping is good vs. making do is bad, made me feel more distanced from the modern world. I felt less connected with people because of it. I couldn’t relate in a way, because if I expressed my own feelings of how I felt doing this or that was bad, I felt it was misconstrued as if I was “trying to tell people how to live”.  It was an odd place to be in. This friend and I are now becoming close again.

It was funny that it wasn’t hats with veils and white gloves and puffy skirts that made me feel disconnected to the world, but the very realization of what the world had become and the way we viewed the 1950’s was so off from what was actually going on. It made me sad because there is so much promise in the 1950s and somewhere along the line we missed the right path and that just made me feel very disconnected and sad, often wanting to quite literally really get into a time machine and go to the actual 1955.

What made it easier and bearable in that aspect was my blog. I have so many wonderful followers and we have become such a community, that it has made the whole experience superb! In fact, because of the people who read and comment on my blog and their own desire to want to learn or improve on their own homemaking skills, it has really given me the hope of my modern times. I know, through our technology, we can grow and make a change where early on I felt powerless and sad, now I feel plugged in and happy to see just what the new Vintage can mean for all of us. It has given my life a scope and direction I never would have thought possible a year ago.

I think one of the hardest  things for me with this project was realizing how my past years seem almost wasted to me in their little endeavors. Of course, I am glad for the journey I have taken to get where I am, but I wish I was realizing the importance of the skills I am now working to gain at say 16 or 20. Of course, perhaps at that age I would have merely scoffed at them, yet given the choice to NOT do it at that age most of us have chosen not to, and in a way, though it would mean ‘forcing it’ upon young people, when you become older you would be thankful for it.

I think sometimes Freedom gets mixed up with Not Caring what you do. I think those are two different sides of the same coin. Freedom is knowing you are equal among others and now you have the right to make your own choices, but there should still be a level of expected responsibility. We should want to be a productive part of the whole. That doesn’t mean conformity, it can also mean being an expressive artist or great musician, but you can’t be either of those things without discipline and if you can’t discipline yourself to clean your home, organize your finances, make your own food, than how will you ever tackle the sometimes insurmountable hills of greatness? “The longest journey DOES begin with the first step” and I think, much of homemaking is an important first step that can than lead down any path. I feel like in my past which was the ‘future’ I was sold short on what the realities of life actually were. We are always told “you can do anything, reach for the stars” schools spend more time, it seems, trying to sell a philosophy of ‘good feeling and positive thinking’ more than the actual skills and knowledge you NEED to try and reach the stars.

 

• Have you noticed a change in any aspect of your life - relationships, stress levels, habits? Have these changes been for the better or the worse?

I would have to say that honestly almost every aspect of my life seems to have changed this year. I know that sounds unbelievable, but quite honestly the very core of my beliefs, how I view myself and my place in the world, how the world currently is run, and my relationship to other people is so drastically different to my ‘old self’ that I sometimes almost think of her as if in a dream.

Early on in the project, I would often find myself doing something and think, “Would the 1955 me, do this?” In a sense, she became almost a separate identity to myself. I lived a sort of ‘forced multiple personality disorder’. There was the ME, which was the modern version and the OTHER ME which was my 1955 persona. What I found has happened is over the stretch of this year, one has converged on the other.

I was just thinking about this today and wondered, “Had one won out or conquered the other?” And I have decided that I feel the two have converged. My basic personality and likes have remained, but I have changed in a way that I feel more adult and yet in many ways feel a freedom I more often associated with childhood.

I recall often wondering, as I grew older, when would I be a ‘grown up’? When would I feel that magical moment when it would happen? Oft times my friends and I would discuss this very topic and it seemed no matter how many responsibilities, mortgages, finishing our education etc, we never quite felt like a ‘grown up’. I have come to see that this evolution, this year, has been a composite of what most young people in the ‘old times’ must have just gone through naturally. There are endless films shown to youngsters and teens in this time and earlier and books and things all about ‘growing up’. Parents, though even if thought ‘square’ were still the ultimate goal:the grown up. Girls looked forward to emulating the styles and responsibilities of ‘grown up women’. Boys, too, looked to the days of responsibility and attitudes of the adult men in their life. This today seems to be almost non-existent. Now, the older people want to be ‘cool’ and try as hard as they can to by young. Mothers are more ‘friends’ to their children than parents. The ultimate search for Youth culture is in full swing.

This incessant need for youth and coolness is the perfect state to be in to become an increasingly consumer culture, for we do NOT get younger and to appear so we must buy products. Clothing styles must be hip and up to date; faces must bewrinkleless, so Botox, surgery the list goes on. We are more concerned about appearing cool and young to younger people than to learning to care for our homes, raising children and making ‘grown up’ decisions about our community. Perhaps if we were more concerned about our minds and responsibilities and making a grown up life, then the younger generation would eventually aspire to it through our example. Somehow along the way ,that concept seems to be lost. How can generations learn to be adults when their own parents don’t understand how to save, handle finances, organize days, make their own food and entertain themselves?

So, here I am feeling more ‘grown up’ and yet my stress level has gone down. To feel one’s place in the world can have a calming affect. I think there is such a culture of ‘Celebrity’ worship today, that most people are more concerned about what those people do and how to become one of them, that their lives are passing them by. To clean a house or be proud of a stack of ironing or well prepared meal is silly, but having an anxious feeling of needing to always be ‘trying to reach the brass ring’ though the rings definition is so vague and the path to it rather impossible, that many people lose out on the simple pure joy of living. SO, to feel plugged into that elusive world of ‘celebrity’ there is the reality show. Watch other people doing and having what you think you should have and then emulate them as best as you can. Of course, being unaware that all of this is simply one large advertisement made to coerce you more into spending and buying.

Simple, middle class life, work and tasks, joy and friends, and the responsibility and real tasks and level of skill that can accompany that can really fill a life with happiness and contentment. But, this is not cool, or fun, or so we think. But, working endless days at jobs we hate to pay off the debt to buy things we couldn’t afford to make our life more bearable because we have to work to earn more to buy more…You can see the sad hamster wheel the modern world has put us on.

When I think of the old ME I feel almost anxious. As if I was always struggling towards some unclear goal without any focus and no real feeling of place. Today, though it might seem boring or to be scoffed at, at the end of a day, if I have a stack of ironing done, meals made, dresses I have made myself and a quiet night with tea, my needlepoint and those I love around me, how could that ever be bad? Certainly, people should struggle and work towards goals that might mean they are very important and celebrity, but for many it won’t happen. There are many potential Happy Homemakers out there that don’t even know it and given a chance might find them self in the most rewarding work ever. And homemaking, the stay at home woman of the 1950s, her position was so elastic. It could become anything she chose.

We are shown or taught that the 1950s smiling wife waiting at home was repressed and stifled, and though that might have been true for some, those with imagination and personal drive that does not need the gratification of others, were very happy and talented. These were women who, with limited budgets, decorated homes, had wonderful wardrobes, happy friends, nights out dancing, bridge parties, ladies teas. They were artists, philosophizers, repairmen, nurses, writers, chefs, the list goes on. There was a reason that image of the woman smiling in the pretty dress and apron with the cocktail waiting for her husband existed. It showed a goal and believe you me, those hours at home, especially without tv and computer all day, are exciting and challenging and fun. There is frustration and problems, of course, but you must work it out, puzzle it away, and that is often more challenging and rewarding than working out of the house.

I find it funny now that we view the housewife of the 1950s as oppressed and bored when you think of the endless chances each of their days could bring to them; the creativity and skill and the sky was the limit for their personal growth, while their husbands often has to do boring tedious work in offices day after day.

Again, that skill set of the homemaker, even if you do not want to become a homemaker, is so important, that it should be taught and discovered. I am happy now, as well, to be a part of learning and teaching that goes on in my blog and know that the learning and sharing can continue on and is exciting AND rewarding. I have never felt oppressed nor put upon. It is true that I have chosen this path, but it IS modern times and women should be show this as an OPTION for them to CHOOSE, not just fed a lie about oppression and mindlessness so instead they watch tv for hours, go out to clubs, and get deeper into dept at college with no real focus. How is THAT not oppression?

So, I would have to say emphatically that the changes wrought by this years project and the lessons of the past have changed my life completely and for the better.

• Will you maintain any of the lifestyle changes once the year ends?

At this point I think most of my changes will stay the same. I will return to reading modern fiction and news, of course, more purposefully, but will most likely find it hard to go back to modern magazines which now seem silly ads for products with no real teaching value. I will see modern movies, of course and those type of things.

However, I feel my clothes will stay the same. I am finding that to choose an area, such as the 1950’s, and to then build a wardrobe by my own hand as well as vintage finds, is so rewarding that I do not want to give it up. Nor, will I ever feel ‘out of style’ if my style is that. This way I can spend less and not need to throw away, but only mend and add to an ongoing style. Why do you think fashion changes? To make money after all it IS a business. But, we modern women now live in a world that doesn’t tell us what length our skirt has to be or etc, so we should USE that and choose an era or style of clothes we like and then focus on that. Think of the wardrobe you would eventually have and the money you would save by never having to get rid of it because the style changed. Basically, every original clothing idea has already been made. You can pick and choose what you like, but then stick with it and evolve within it. This is truly what being chic is all about, I think. My hair, as well, which is now short with bangs is so easy to maintain and so fun to curl, that will continue on after this project. I understand now why very old women from this time often still have their original hair cuts/sets.

My role of homemaker, though uncertain of it’s path in 1 January 1955, I think will continue on. The more modern aspect of my life will be the continued use of the computer but to learn programming that will allow me to now run a website that coincides with my blog so I can go further with revising and showing the Homemaking skills. I want to grow in my own local community as well as continue to grow my online community. I feel we women should share and celebrate our history of homemaking.

Things like modern fast food, chips and junk food, I have found I do not want to return to. The more I learn to make my own things the more I realize how horrid modern processed manufactured foods actually taste. The more I find that has been ‘hidden’ by greed and government about ‘store-bought’ foods, the more I want to make my own things. My hubby told me about the sweetener splenda, which had been turned down by the FDA for years until Donald Rumsfeld, who was  involved in it, was appointed to a political position. That combined with lobbyists throwing money at our politicians allowed them to approve something they knew unsafe. I used that product as a sweetener and bought products containing it up until this year. It was even found out that it tricks the body into thinking it has actual sugar so your body produces the level of insulin it would need to process the actual sugar calories which is dangerous to your body. A very unsafe result and it also makes you more hungry in the end. I feel used in such a way by news like that. I feel no more than a wallet to our government in ways like that and it just has me wanting to be more in control of the parts of my life that I can, such as my own food preparation, which I have also come to find enjoyable.

So, with the exception of a few things relating to news and modern movies and culture, I will most likely remain the same. It has become to me so much my LIFE and less a costume or artistic performance piece, that I am not even sure if I really could ‘return to the present’ wholeheartedly.

What I don’t want to do, however, is to live disconnected and feel that I am locking myself away in a fantasy world of untruth, but in fact a new kind of Modern is born in me. I feel more than ever that I want to become involved in my community and to share and learn such skills as I have with others. I can’t ever be again the norm of current modern, but in a way I almost will feel ultra modern in a way that is taking things from the past but challenging the ideals and ideas of my day. It is funny to think the norm today would be a tattooed pierced consumer while the ‘subversive’ is the lady in the petticoat hat and gloves, talking about baking for her local community.  Is Homemaking the NEW Counterculture? Perhaps corporations will make school films showing why not to give in to the subversive lifestyle of the homemaker!

 

• How have you found the clothing of the 50’s? Has it been an effort to prepare yourself like a 50’s women each day? (corsets, girdles etc)

I have found the fashions to be fun and flattering. I do wear a girdle, but when I am at home working or in the height of summer I did not. My stockings and garter belt were only worn in the summer to more ‘formal’ or a ‘city occasion’. It was perfectly appropriate for me to wear a summer cotton dress without hose as I live in a summer resort area.

At first the girdle was a little odd to wear, but I now know why many older ladies hold onto their girdles. They are comfortable and hold you in and make your clothes fit is a way that makes you feel good. But, really, the new SPANX product today is merely a girdle. Women want to look beautiful, I think.

I think the hardest for me is keeping up with my nails. I am always cleaning and washing and in the summer in the garden, so I need to be more diligent about my gloves. Ladies wore gloves not only in the summer as part of their fashion, but to clean and garden (thus rubber and gardening gloves). Keeping your nails covered and therefore only needing to touch them up throughout the week seems to allude me, but I do wish to do a better job of it. I also don’t feel any less intelligent or smart in caring for my appearance. I have come to see that we, as women, can look beautiful and feel pretty and still discuss politics and literature. I think not trying to do both is a sort of let down to our predecessors. One does not get smarter the dingier one gets.

We are  after all, creatures of habit, so even my wardrobe has become so normal to me, that I am not sure I could or would go back to jeans and t’s. I would feel underdressed or more ‘uncomfortable’ not having my hat and gloves or wearing a dress to go out shopping/dinner.

It is interesting, as many people may not think that fashion matters to them, but with this experiment I have found that what you wear can be as important to your emotional level as what you read/watch/ think about. The 1955 woman may have felt she only had limited choices in the fashion, such as the New Look lengths, but within that ‘safe harbor’ of skirt lengths and what to wear when, was left open your interpretation of the outcome. You could accessorize and create your own style within that framework. And, beside feeling good or uplifted in nice clothes with your hair done and the right accessories, when you are with a group of women who are doing something similar (as sometimes happens when I coerce my friends into a gathering in vintage garb such as my recent Birthday tea) it has a feeling of wonderful fairytale quality. You feel as if you are playing dress up/grown up and then realize you are the grown up. So, on a psychological level, clothes really seem to be an important part of the psyche to adult hood.

I think part of the current  state of  our all being great grown babies and not adults, may lie in the clothes as well. It is easy to slouch, be mindless and watch tv in ‘comfy clothes’ but get together with friends in nicer clothes and you want to sit up straight, hold your tea cup and saucer, balance your plate carefully upon your napkin upon your knee, ankles crossed. It is great that we CAN act as we choose, but in that choice I just wish we would CHOOSE SOMETIMES to act grownups. Perhaps I am just an anachronism now, but I do know that I am happy and content with the pattern of my life. Though I may be the odd ball in the room in a petticoat and white gloves, I feel better and happier, so that is a part I don’t want to lose sight of. Clothes can matter and affect your life. It is the outward expression of who or what we want to be. I don’t want to be a lazy runner in a track suit watching tv, so I won’t dress that part. It is no harder to put on a dress and zip it up than to wear old jeans and t’s and yet the resulting feeling you get and the positive result you often get from others can make your day go from gray to blue. I know that sounds trite, but I also know it is true.

• Have you ever felt you wanted to stop the project? Or have you adopted it wholeheartedly?

In the beginning, after the first rush of a month or so, I felt as if I wondered if I should stop. I really felt my very psyche, the core of who the “I” or “ME” was, being questioned. I began to also feel cut off and longed for a time in which I didn’t live. I would often spend some time watching old 1950’s family films that my hubby had found for me on YouTube and feeling rather sad.

Then I began to see that what I was missing was not a past I had never experienced, but all the skills and sense of place and community that once existed. Once I figured that out I pretty much went full tilt into the project and slid into the role easier than any other I have ever tried.

• Would you like to add anything else?

I think my final words should be that never would I have thought, a year ago, something viewed with such disdain could be so rewarding. I think the home arts are such an integral part of womanhood and our history that it is a shame they are falling on the wayside. Even if you would never yourself want to be a homemaker, to not at least study and know of what it entails and what is meant is a disservice to your own sex. As History was being made and nations built, women were there cooking, mending, sewing, creating, challenging, raising children, creating homes in every aspect. I hope that all women could see the relevance and importance this part of our history has to us, as women, and to our future sisters. I don’t think an advanced people can ever truly move forward without first looking back.

2 November 1955 “Happy Birthday To Me”

Well, today is my birthday. Being a lady it is my prerogative to not say WHICH birthday it is.

Although I am celebrating this evening at a restaurant with a group of friends and family, yesterday I was lucky to have a lovely Ladies Vintage Birthday Tea! Though my hubby was there and my friends fiancé  showed up later to keep him company, we were mostly ladies.

When I first had the idea my friends mentioned to me if I would rather go out to tea, instead of my having to plan and prepare the majority of it myself. I considered this and realized, much of the fun for me is the planning and preparing. I love to try new recipes and of course to entertain in my home, so why not throw my own tea for my birthday.

I had such fun! It was a High Tea in the sense that we had it at 4:00. I made a spread that consisted of both sweet and savory. Here I am, happily aproned showing off my spread.I had my first go at Petits fours and was quite pleased with the result. It was white cake baked in a sheet pan. Then I sliced it into long strips splitting those in half. In between the layers I put a butter cream frosting with almond flavoring and then they were individually drizzled with the icing of confectioners sugar, almond flavoring and cream. I had to drizzle it three times, but could have done many layers to give it a more ‘finished look’. I was happy with them and they were wonderful with the tea. Sweet and melt in your mouth goodness. My friends fiancé said, when he showed up later for ‘cocktail hour’ that they were like eating sweet snow, in that they melted in your mouth. I took this to be a compliment. Here is a close up of them. One of my gifts from Gussie, besides a lovely pair of new gloves ( a gal can never have enough!) was the last of the fresh raspberries from the farm where she works. They were a perfect touch. I also used a single chocolate square and coconut to garnish the rest.

I also tried my hand at coconut macaroons, which were so easy, and I dipped them in Lindt Chocolate melted with sweetened condensed milk. Really good.Here is the recipe if you would like to try them.

Quick Coconut Macaroons

1 1/2 cups flaked coconut

1/2 cup sweetened condensed milk

Dash of salt

1 tsp vanilla

1/4 tsp almond extract

Combine all ingredients and mix well. Drop from teaspoon 1 inch apart on greased baking sheet and press down ends of coconut with back of spoon. Bake in moderate oven (350 degrees F) for 10-12 minutes or until golden brown. (I had to bake mine longer, as I like them golden with  a crisp outside and soft inside. These are also wonderful with chopped almonds or an almond on top covered in chocolate. Easy AND a crowd pleaser!

There was also my now famous chocolate chip cookies with coconut (coconut themed, as you can see). I had a bread pudding I made with the leftover white cake form my petit for and leftover icing. I just broke up the cake, spooned in the leftover confectioners sugar icing, mixed in the leftover egg yolks from my white cake (I only needed the whites as it was a ‘true’ white cake) and sprinkled it with cinnamon and nutmeg. Very sweet, but a great pudding with a strong black tea.

Then for savories, I made little tea sandwiches. There were cucumber and butter, cucumber and dill mayonnaise. I also had deviled ham with sweet relish and chicken salad with sweet relish sandwiches and smoked salmon and cream cheese sandwiches. And various relish and pickles and olives and a cheese ball mixed with wine and coated in walnuts. Such a spread of little finger foods is really quite filling, and we merely used little dessert plates and then could mingle and nibble throughout the night as it went from dainty tea party to cocktail hour.

One of my friends gave as a gift a darling little pair of gold needlepoint scissors and a needlepoint set containing a threader, a magnetic needle case and an ingenius little pin you wear that is magnetic to keep track of your needles. Another friend gave me four jars of her homemade jam (Cranberry chutney, pineapple honey, blueberry, and strawberry).

We had such a lovely time.Here are some friends laughing over tea. I am not sure if you can see my hat in this picture, but it has a darling little veil which I wore early on, but raise later.Sandwiches and fun! My table clothes are both vintage. The white linen cloth was my mothers and the flowered one over that is also vintage. I love the colors of this cloth as it mingles the red and the aqua I love and felt it complimented my everyday china and plate. I could have used my fine china, but since it was a casual affair for the most part and I liked the color combination with my table cloth, I went with my everyday. It does get much love.

We took time to enjoy the warmer fall weather outside. Here we are in the grips of a funny story. The dress I am wearing (I am on the far left) I had just finished the day before. It is of a darling little plaid of black, navy, and green. I am well petticoated as you can see. I have one very FULL petticoat that I can only really wear with a heavier material skirt and it worked great with the weight of this wool. Very comfortable dress. The waistline was individually pleated and took some time, but was well worth it.

    We took time to be silly, too, of course.

Here I am playing the chanteuse by the piano. I adore these shoes, they are one of my favorite pair and though they have a high heel, are so comfortable. They are truly a mid 50’s shoe as they have a rounded tow and a thicker heel, the stiletto and point will not be truly around until the end of the decade. 

Now, my tea party was yesterday, but today, the 2nd, is my actual birthday. I was awoken by hubby this morning with hot coffee in bed and some gifts. I recieved an old first edition of a fiction book taking place on Cape Cod. A vintage 1950’s edition on how to repair, build, maintain historic homes from the 1700’s New England. I was very excited about this because in the sections on ‘modern kitchens’ that can fit with your antique home, it has 1950’s versions of colonial/modern. I got various assortments of teas to restock the tea cabinet and my favorite gift was this wonderful vintage mixer.This is it in my kitchen here in our ‘new’ house just taken this morning. I just mentioned, maybe once, that I really needed a good vintage stand mixer but I wanted one that did juice AND had an attachment for meat grinding. I had no idea my hubby would have thought of this nor been able to find such a great condition one with all the original parts. And the color looks lovely with the red in my kitchen. Look how it sets off the curtains! All in all, a great birthday in a great year.

We had planned on going out to breakfast this morning, but I thought about it and considered our leftover salmon and homemade bread and thought I would rather eat at home, in comfort. I told hubby, no thanks, I think I would rather make our breakfast.

So, as I watched the eggs scramble and prepared the smoked salmon I really got to thinking. Here it was my birthday and normally it would see the thing to do was to go out and celebrate. A day OUT of the kitchen and yet I really wanted to be in there. I really felt, why spend the money and do something because it seems like I should, when I honestly would rather be in here doing it myself, eating of my own china in my dining room in comfort. This really made me realize how this year has shown the simplicity of life and its inherent luxury. The joy in my own creation and skill. Why take a break from what you really love because it is your birthday? And, here I am, at the end of this year 1955, genuinely in love with my ‘career’ and overall my life.

This made me feel very good, to say the least and of course more charged to continue learning and growing and to hopefully inspire maybe others who would never think they COULD enjoy such a life, but may find out it is the perfect fit for them.

This has been a good year and today a good birthday. I am so happy to have shared it thus far with all of you, my readers. Thank you so much for coming along for the ride with me. I truly feel we ARE a community and look forward to all your comments, opinions, thoughts, and ideas. I hope we can continue to grow and learn together.

Oh, and for fun, I wanted to share black and white versions of the above photos, as I thought they really do look vintage. I wanted some to have color so you could see our dresses and hats, but in black and white, I am amazed at how ‘authentic’ they look.

Have a wonderful day, Apron Revolutionaries!